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4 Skills to Help Extrovert vs Introverts Communicate Better

Relationships are complicated and nowhere is that more evident than when you’re dating. Each person behaves and communicates differently. For example, assume you and your partner get home from a long day of work and meetings. One of you - the extrovert - is eager to talk and interact with the other. The other one - the introvert - is eager to be alone for a few hours, leaving your partner thinking you want nothing to do with them. However, that is not the case; it’s just that you both fall on different sides of the extroversion and introversion spectrum.

Extroversion and introversion refer to where people draw their energy from. Extroverts draw their energy from social interactions. Introverts draw their energy from solitude. This causes a lot of miscommunication and confusion between partners, but it does not have to damage your relationship. Take these steps into consideration:

  1. Most relationship problems occur when you or your partner don’t understand each other. Take time to ask questions and listen. Extroverts easily talk about how they feel; introverts need a little bit more time. When couples understand this about each other they don’t feel hurt by their partner’s lack of openness right away.

  2. Agree to take one or two hours after work to decompress from the day and do what makes you feel comfortable. For the extrovert, that may mean catching up on social media or texts. For the introvert, that may mean retreating to their room for a nap or some television.

  3. During arguments, extroverts needs to focus on calming down and keeping their voice lower when they disagree. The introvert needs to understand that part of being in a healthy relationship is dealing with conflict as it happens. Shutting down or withdrawing to solitude during conflict doesn’t mean a problem doesn’t exist - it means you’re avoiding it.

  4. Keep a sense of humor. Relationships are alive, and the two people in the relationship give it purpose, meaning, and connection. What are the chances that you would find a person who communicates the opposite of you? Love is limitless, and the fact that you found someone so unique to you is a wonderful opportunity to grow in insight and love.

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