A big, common problem I see with my clients is the misunderstanding of what it means to be married. There is more time spent planning the wedding and engagement than considering the concept of spending the rest of their life together. Therefore, couples often have unrealistic expectations or no expectations at all. Although there are no guarantees in marriage, there are healthy expectations you should hold for yourself and your spouse. Below are ten things that should compris

June is one of the most popular months for weddings, which is why so many of my friends (and myself) are celebrating their anniversaries this month. It’s likely that you’re receiving or sending wedding invitations that talk about living happily ever after in wedded bliss. It doesn’t take long before we realize wedded bliss is a thing of fairy tales. Marriage takes work; more than work, marriage requires daily practice of communicating effectively and going the extra mile to b

One difficult phrase and concept that I try to get my clients to understand is “mind-blowing intimacy.” This is no surprise as we are inundated with “mind-blowing sex” on reality TV, in magazines, on the Internet, and in movies. “Mind-blowing sex” gets the highest media ratings, as well as most couples’ attention. In truth, “mind-blowing sex” is nothing compared to “mind-blowing intimacy.” In real life, “mind-blowing sex” cannot save a marriage, nor can the lack of it destroy

Relationships are complicated and, although they bring great joy, they also bring challenges. Often, there are things you don’t understand about yourself until you’re involved in an intimate relationship, and one of those things is codependence. Although most relationships experience a mild to moderate level of codependence at times, truly codependent relationship are unbearable and personal growth is almost impossible. Codependency is based on a feeling that you cannot exist

As a seasoned licensed therapist, I can tell you that relationships change over time and with society. For millennials it means wanting a Facebook relationship status that everyone will recognize, like, and comment on. They want couple photos on Instagram, along with both people looking happy and “in-vogue.” They want someone to come home to and who is there for them, but they don’t necessarily understand the work behind creating a relationship. This is a generation that grew

Porn is everywhere today, and it’s available on every gadget you own. This compulsion has ruined numerous marriages and relationships, but another problem with porn is how it impacts the mind. Porn changes brain chemistry, making the user less likely to appreciate and sustain a loving relationship. However, these changes don’t happen overnight, which is why porn advocates continue to dismiss the claims. If you watch porn or live with someone who does, the list below may expla

Expectations get in the way with reality and setting your expectations too high can lead to frustration and breakups. There are things you can expect though and, in fact, you should expect in a healthy relationship. These things are not negotiable. If your relationship doesn't have these qualities, it will be one-sided in power and not give you the emotional or physical fulfillment a healthy relationship should provide. The top 7 realistic expectations you can and should coun