We all have times when we argue with the one we love. Sometimes those arguments turn into episodes that hurt feelings and make people feel unloved. I have put together a list of 75 things you can do instead of fight with your parnter. Make a copy of this and put it up in your home. No one has to use words when they are angry and sometimes it is wiser not to.

1. Work on a jigsaw puzzle (the more pieces the more helpful).
2. Wash the car.
3. Rake leaves.
4. Vacuum one room of the house and keep going until you feel less angry.
5. Do a load of laundry.
6. Iron.
7. Mow the lawn.
8. Caulk all the showers and tubs.
9. Varnish or paint the front door.
10. Sort out your clothes, saving bags of clothes for various charities.
11. Dust the furniture.
12. Call a friend.
13. Listen to your favorite music.
14. Walk around the block or several blocks.
15. Run.
16. Do jumping jacks. This will raise your endorphins and make you see things in a new light.
17. Jump rope (at least 10 minutes).
18. Write a story in your journal about what happened.
19. Make cookies or cupcakes from scratch.
20. Make lasagna or something else that will take the focus off of your anger.
21. Bake bread from scratch. Kneading and pounding the dough may help.
22. Pray.
23. Watch a funny movie.
24. Search for funny Youtube videos.
25. Get a manicure.
26. Get a massage.
27. Take a shower. Sometimes warm or cold water helps people feel better.
28. Spray a nice smelling cologne or perfume. Smells, like lavender or vanilla, help us calm down.
29. Take a hot bath and put nice smelling bath oils in the water.
30. Do wood working. Sanding and concentrating can help you refocus.
31. Write a letter to the person you are angry at. Tell them why you are so upset. Either burn the letter or save it. Never send it for at least 48 hours.
32. Look at happy photos of the two of you and any children you may have. This makes us able to see things in a different perspective.
33. Scrub the kitchen floor, sink and/or counters.
34. Throw a ball or play with your dog. If you have cats, let them chase light from a flashlight.
35. Paint a pitcher, sketch, or paint a piece of furniture. Doing something creative will help.
36. Play computer games or solitaire.
37. Practice a mantra. I like, “Let go, Let God,” or, “This too shall pass.” Anything that helps you feel in control and at peace will help.
38. Practice the piano or guitar. Musical instruments have a way of taking us out of our thoughts and changing the mood.
39. Sip a cup of hot tea.
40. Stroll in a bookstore.
41. Put a model plane, train or car together. This is a good way to divert our attention and not talk.
42. Shoot hoops.
43. Work on a crossword puzzle.
44. Go to the grocery store.
45. Go to an art museum.
46. Go to a flower shop and buy yourself a bouquet.
47. Get your hair cut. Having your hair washed and your scalp massaged helps dissolve anger.
48. Wash your dog or pet.
49. Dance.
50. Go fishing.
51. Surf the Internet.
52. Go to a driving range and hit golf balls.
53. Go to the park or find a wall where you can hit a tennis ball.
54. Go to a batting cage.
55. Go to an arcade.
56. Trim the bushes or tree branches in the yard.
57. Go bowling.
58. Listen to a CD of rain or nature sounds.
59. Wash the windows.
60. Replant the plants that have outgrown their pots. Digging in the dirt helps ground us and keep us in the here and now.
61. Brush your teeth. Don't forget to floss too!
62. Splash water on your face. Cold water is the best.
63. Check your light bulbs and change them.
64. Change the air conditioning filters.
65. Polish your shoes.
66. Look through magazines.
67. Work out with a DVD video. Abs of steel is a great way to sweat and feel good about yourself.
68. Change your oil.
69. Check the air in your tires.
70. Wash the wheels of your car.
71. Go for a bike ride (wear your helmet).
72. Play with a remote car or boat.
73. Go swimming.
74. Watch an old movie.
75. Clean out a drawer you have noted in the past is too cluttered.