Sometimes growing up we don't get the guidance or nurturing we need. Our parents are too critical or someone in the family hurts us. We grow up feeling like we are never good enough, smart enough or pretty enough. I liken this to a flower vase. No matter how much water is poured into our vase to keep the flowers alive, there is a leak, and water leaks out. You don't have to live your life always feeling empty or not good enough. There are things you can do to help yourself and seal the leak. Below are 20 suggestions to get you started. Once you begin to feel more confident you can add to this list, and before long the leak will be sealed.

1. Exercise. Ten minutes of exercise three times a day will begin making you feel more vibrant, alive and confident. Ten minutes is about the same amount of time it takes most of us to talk ourselves out of exercise.
2. Eat healthy. This makes you feel better about yourself and it is one thing everyone can do to feel better in their own body.
3. Listen to spiritual or nature music. This type of music helps calm us and we begin breathing at a slower and deeper pace.
4. Get a massage. Having someone touch us makes us feel connected. A massage helps our muscles relax.
5. Pamper yourself with a new hair style, pedicure, or manicure. Nurturing yourself is a form of self-care. It is very important.
6. Instead of waiting to receive flowers, pick up a bouquet for yourself at the grocery store.
7. Recite your favorite quotes or prayers. These are tapes, and when you memorize them they have the ability to empower you when you are feeling vulnerable.
8. Submit a prayer online. Many online prayer support websites are standing by to pray with you or for you. When you submit a prayer, it allows you to let go for awhile and relax, knowing a source greater than yourself is going to help solve your dilemma.
9. Join a support group. If you have a problem that you are trying to work though, nothing can be as helpful as joining a group where others struggle with the same challenge. It will help you, and you can help others by being there.
10. Have a party and invite people who have inspired you. This is a great way to give back, and also a great way for you to be surrounded by people who have mentored something significant for you. Sometimes when we hang out with confident people we begin mimicking the behaviors they model, and by doing that we become more confident and self-assured.
11. Practice smiling more. People become less defensive around someone who smiles, and they also are more likely to smile back and embrace you.
12. Call a friend and ask them what they admire most about you.
13. Read an inspiring book, or take a class. When you read about others or learn something new you challenge your old, faulty way of thinking.
14. Buy one article of clothing that flatters your body, skin color, or eyes. This can be a scarf, shirt, or skirt. It can be from a resale shop. It isn't the money you spend, but the fact that you take the time to choose something that flatters you.
15. Create something. Making something can make us so grateful for our gifts or talents. Many people who lack self-esteem or feel broken have focused on a very narrow area of acceptance. Most of us have many gifts, and what we lack in one area we make up in another.
16. Listen to a child when you ask them what they like best about you. Kids are honest and they see through the masks that many adults do not.
17. Get a pet. Pets love us, and as far as I know they are the only creatures that really are capable of unconditional love.
18. Nurture a plant. People who care for other things usually find themselves feeling better and more complete. Being totally consumed with ones' self is never a good place to be.
19. Write a thank you note. IF you cannot think of anyone who deserves one, write one to your parents, husband, wife, friend, or child for being such a significant part of your life.
20. Do something kind for someone completely anonymous. Nothing will make you feel more full than helping to fill someone else.