There is no one time to predict when sex is right in a relationship. If you have sex too soon you will most likely doom the relationship, but many of us don't think about when to have sex. We feel the passion, enjoy this person, enjoy the surroundings and wake up the next morning asking ourselves "what did I do?”

When to have sex differs depending on who you ask (if you are under the age of 18 years it’s too early…wait until your frontal cortex is fully developed). If you ask your parents they will say when you are 30 years old. If you ask a sexually active friend they will say now. If you ask a baby boomer they will say wait as long as you can before having sex. So, my first request is you ask yourself.

Having sex is an important decision and if you aren't ready for the possible consequences don't have it. Remember that sex will never make someone love you who doesn't—don't kid yourself by someone telling you that sex will make them love you. Do you trust this person? If you cannot say yes then it is not time. How does this person make you feel? Do they adore you or take you for granted?

Next talk to your partner. What do they want out of the relationship? Will sex mean the same thing to them as it will to you? What is the relationship made of—is there more than lust underneath the physical desire? Being clear can help you decide if you want sex.  

Be safe. Your body is yours to protect. If you sleep with someone and have unprotected sex you are sleeping with everyone they ever have slept with. You are also opening yourself up to every sexually transmitted disease (STD) they may have (which some people won't tell you about). Be smart. Before sex make an agreement with your partner that you both will be checked out for STDs prior to having sex. Make sure you look at each other's report.

So...what if you told your boyfriend or girlfriend you were ready for sex and then you change your mind? It's okay. You are not a machine. Feelings change, behaviors change. You never owe anyone sex. Don't let them pressure you or force you. Someone who respects you will want you to be ready for sex and they will understand. They may not be happy, but they will understand.