(For women it’s the little things that matter most)
Being a great husband is difficult, and guys feel confused about what their wives really want. It’s easier to go through your marriage on autopilot settling for okay instead of being the man your wife and kids need you to be. Marriage is about being the best version of you, and although that seems overwhelming in today’s world, women feel the most loved with the little things, and every husband can and should strive to do them.
Below are five things that will make your wife glad she married you, and your kids grateful you’re their dad (kids benefit when they see their dad being a great husband to their mom).
- Step up and do your part of the chores, noticing when your wife is stressed. In every poll taken, a man’s willingness to pitch in and do housework is a predictor for marital bliss. Wives feel supported and noticed by husbands who can tell they’re overwhelmed and step in to take some of the load. Kids benefit by knowing that doing household chores is not gender specific.
- Be romantic in and out of the bedroom. Husbands become romantic at bedtime or in the bedroom, and this leaves wives feeling used, undesired, and passionless. Being affectionate, spontaneous and romantic throughout her day with no expectation of sex will make her feel adored and desired all day.
- Create a sweet ritual that you continue. Rituals are the little sweet things you do for your partner. Make her coffee in the morning or pack her lunch with a love note. It’s an act of love instead of just telling her you love her. When a wife can count on a husband doing that “something special” every day they feel loved and special. Little things like putting air in her tires or fixing her jewelry, or surprising her with little things she never expected make her feel treasured and secure in your love.
- Give her your full attention when you talk with her. When husbands put their phones away or give their wives eye contact when they’re talking, wives report higher marital contentment. Women overthink and have difficulty shutting their thoughts down. When a husband listens and allows her to talk about her day she appreciates and loves him more.
- Protect your wife. You don’t need to fight for your wife, but she needs to know she can trust you and find shelter in you. Women who know their husbands are on their side and completely transparent, deepen their trust and open up more about their vulnerabilities. This breaks down defensiveness and improves communication. Once again, it’s the little things you do such as saying we instead of me, sharing passwords, talking about future trips, and visions for your marriage that makes a wife sure that she has the most awesome husband in the world.
Being a great husband is being willing to put your wife first. Women complain that they feel as though they’re raising another child because they feel alone in managing their household. Video games, hanging out with the boys, and engaging in things you did as a single guy don’t work in marriage. Step up, dig in and be the man you promised you’d be when she married you.