There’s a reason you’re attracted to the “bad boy,” and what makes divorce so easy in the American culture? Answers to these questions will make you stop and think about your beliefs and relationship intentions. Knowledge and self-reflection are powerful in helping you grow and understand.
Dear Mary Jo,
Why am I always attracted to the “bad boy?”
There are probably several reasons you like bad boys; the thrill of trying to conquer them or make them yours as well as the challenge of dating someone your parents or society label as risqué or bad for you. Men and women who were raised in strict families feel the need to rebel by going against what norms were for their family. However, know this; most of the masculine attraction you see in a “bad boy” is a false masculinity. They may be physically attractive, great at short-term excitement and flattery, but it’s meant to charm one and all, not just you. In reality, nice guys don’t finish last…they just make sure the woman they love comes first.
Dear Mary Jo,
I am from a culture where marriage means forever, so I am wondering what makes it so easy for Americans to dispose of their marriage?
America is at the bottom of a top 10 list for countries with the most divorces with 53% of failed marriages. France is at 55% and Belgium is the highest at 71%. Marriage failure is correlated with a society that focuses on money, individualism and lacks support for families. The top reasons for divorce among families in the United States are:
- Inability to communicate openly and honestly with each other.
- Lack of pre-marital education (many parents of newlyweds are divorced and not able to give good counsel).
- Financial issues.
- Unrealistic expectations with intimacy and sex.
- Lack of commitment to prioritizing family and a shared vision.